Thankful Light
“…give
thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
~1 Thess. 5:18 (NIV)
“I can’t wait to touch a dolphin,
Mommy!” He says looking up at me with his big blue eyes. “Me too, buddy.” I
smile and say back to him as we all headed to Florida to celebrate my
daughter’s 11th birthday.
Touching dolphins, feeding them,
training them and of course – getting splashed by them – was absolutely
amazing. We all had the best time.
After our experience was over we decided
to check out the rest of the park.
The kids saw this jungle gym looking
thing and my first reaction to it was…NOPE! But they really wanted to go in it
and so I caved. I never let them do these kinds of things at certain “fast
food” chains – so I reluctantly allowed it only because we were at Sea World.
They went running ahead of us with
excitement.
They climb the ropes to the first level
and decide to slide down. My daughter, I thought was the first one down. I’m
standing waiting on my little man to come.
He’s not coming. I look up into the slides but he’s not in any of
them. Where is he? I start scanning the
crowd of kids and it’s like it is all in slow motion. I look at my husband and
he goes up to see if he can find him. I’m scanning and yelling his name now. I
can’t find him and immediately – I panic. I feel like I stop breathing as I’m
screaming for my son. I stay at the bottom of the slide because I’m afraid to
move just in case he comes back to the slide. My daughter starts crying because
she is afraid now. Where is he and why is he not running back? I know I am
screaming loud but this place has kids running all around screaming with
laughter. I scream but feel like it is not loud enough. Scanning the crowd constantly
- but no red headed little boy in sight. I scream again and think I hear for a
moment his voice. I think I hear “Mommy!”
Finally, I see a boy running – he has
red hair and he sees his Daddy. It’s
him! It’s my boy! He jumps into his Daddy’s arms. “Thank you GOD!” Was it two
minutes, five minutes or more? I can’t tell you exactly, but it was the longest
fearful moments I’ve ever had with him.
I grab him from my husband and hold onto
him with all the Mother’s love I can give…because I’m never letting him go.
He was the first one down the slide and
once his little feet hit the bottom – he took off to do more of the ropes on
the jungle gym thinking his sister was right behind him.
So many things went through my head
after that. The fear that ran through my body. The what-ifs in my head. The
immediate panic. It took
everything I had to turn my mood back around to the feeling we all had after
the dolphins.
I kept repeating in my head, “thank you
God for my son.” And then I just started listing out all the things I was
thankful for with him. His red hair. His “old soul.” His blue eyes. The way
that one hair curls on the back of his head. His hand in mine. The way he likes
to take my hair and stick it in his ear. Yes, so thankful for that.
My mood starts to shift. Because the
antidote is in the retina. The things I see in front of me change my feeling
inside of me.
We make our way to a roller coaster –
standing in line I’m still rolling off my thanks. It’s our turn next on the
ride and we sit down in our seats. Pull the lap bar down and wait for the
thumbs up. The ride begins to move and we make our way to the top of the
coaster. As soon as we begin to go downhill at mach speed we all begin to
laugh. Laughter is pure medicine.
I could stress over what could have been
or make up crazy stuff in my head…because that is what I do. Or I can give
thanks, breathe, laugh, hunt for the beauty in it all and trust.
Today, start listing off all that you
are thankful for in your life. Watch your mood change. Let’s be thankful for
what we have…by listing He gently wakes us up, our light brightens and He gives
us kingdom-eyes.
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